How to Stop Comparing Yourself to Other People

Each of us is a unique strand in the intricate web of life and here to make a contribution.” – Deepak Chopra

So, do you celebrate your uniqueness? If not, then it’s vitally important that you understand how worthy and special you are. That you learn how to embrace yourself for all that you are and learn how to stop comparing yourself to other people.  

Raise your hand if you are guilty of comparison.  I know, it’s hard to admit.  Whether it’s about material possessions, our professional life or how we look –  we easily compare ourselves to other people.

It’s great to notice others and acknowledge what they are doing –  however, we have to be careful. The illusion of perfectionism that the media portrays can drain your energy and discourage a positive path forward.

It is completely fine to desire to do our best. It’s wonderful to have role models that we can look to for inspiration. Ultimately, though, it is our own growth that we should focus on.

Competition with others pulls us off our path.  Your unique journey deserves your full attention.  

So how can we refocus and begin to celebrate our individuality and uniqueness?

 

Here are 8 ideas on how to stop comparing yourself to other people:

 

1. Embrace the truth: you are an original

There’s no one else just like you. You, like every other human being on this planet, came to Earth with a special set of gifts. You radiate unique energy and you’ve got unique desires. 

During our formative years, we’re squeezed a one size fits all education system. In childhood, we learn that we are supposed to be, believe, and act like those around us.

This is obviously an issue because we aren’t meant to be all the same. We are born with unique gifts and strengths for a reason. We all have our song to sing, a special life path to walk down, and our own individual ideas about what it means to be successful and happy. 

And thank goodness for that! How boring wouldn’t it be if we all looked the same, did the same thing for a living, and shared all the same gifts and desires? Well, that would not only be boring – it would be impossible.

Now, when we remember the impossibility of every person playing the same part, we can more easily learn how to stop comparing ourselves to other people and celebrate the fact that we are all originals.  

2. Remind yourself that social media isn’t real life

Everyone wants to show themselves off to the world on their best days. Especially on social media. That’s completely natural.

However, if we compare the days where we feel down with someone else’s best day ever, then we will be feeling down.  And, we already discussed that comparison is a slippery slope.  It’s best to stay off the ice!

Further, many times we turn to scrolling on the days we feel the most vulnerable and are the most likely to compare ourselves to others and engage in self-critical behavior. 

Therefore, if you’re having an awful day and need a little boost, go do something that fills you up like a walk in nature or a new good book. 

3. Find out what your superpowers are and expand on them

Everyone has superpowers. Even people who haven’t found them yet.  If you haven’t identified your superpowers – it’s time to start digging!

Start by looking within. Get to know yourself at a deep soul-level by journaling or spending time in meditation. Make a list of your strengths.

If it’s challenging to make a list then look to what brings you joy. Usually, we tend to love and derive joy from the things we are naturally good at. You can also ask your loved ones for assistance as they may see aspects of you you cannot see yourself. 

Our talents and gifts sometimes come so naturally to us that we forget that they are our gifts! 

Stay focused on your own superpowers – cultivate them – and remember that you have gifts others don’t have.

In areas where you excel, they may struggle – and vice versa. And we can all use our superpowers to help others and they can use theirs to help us.

4. Understand how important you are 

If you are comparing yourself to other people during moments when you are hit with a feeling of inadequacy, please internalize the truth: you are good enough.

Not only are you good enough as you are right now – you are needed to be exactly as you are. The unique and true you. 

The Dalai Lama said himself: “If we’re not being ourselves, we cannot be of service.”

Authenticity is precious. If we don’t play our role, the one we were given when we came here – other people cannot play their role. It doesn’t matter how big or small our role in the Whole may appear – every role is equally important and irreplaceable. 

5. Spend time in nature

Spending time in Nature is a great way of coming back to your center. Nature doesn’t compare itself to anything. It simply is.

The tree doesn’t compare its qualities to that of the mountain. Yes, it’s different and smaller in size, but equal in its importance and it knows that.  

For me, nature is one of the most effective ways of getting out of the comparison trap. Nature shows me what’s truly important in life – Love, clean air, health, deep connections. 

Nature guides us to ask ourselves the question: “At the end of the day, does it really matter if our neighbor’s lawn is prettier, or if my co-worker became an employee of the month and I didn’t?”  Of course not.

Spending time in nature inspires us to reflect on what’s truly important in life. And in this way, it’s a very effective anti-comparison tool.

Nature teaches us how to stop comparing ourselves to other people by reminding us that we are all unique pieces of the Cosmic masterpiece. 

6. Practice gratitude

Expressing gratitude is very important as it expands our view and makes us see the bigger picture. We all have something to be grateful for at every moment in time.

Gratitude is a wonderful happiness practice that grounds us into the present moment and helps us recognize that some aspects of our lives are working after all – no matter how hopeless we may feel.

Perhaps we are lucky enough to have loving people around us or to be healthy and do fulfilling work. Focusing on the good we have now is actually a solid path to more accomplishments in the future.

7. Do a social media detox if you need to

Sometimes the best thing we can do is simply to turn off. If you find that you get discouraged anxious by excessive time spent on social media, then you may need to make it a priority to protect your energy

Take time out for yourself and engage in nourishing activities like yoga or meditation. Do what you need in order to find your center and come back into balance. 

8. Accept the fact that someone is better – and it can be a good thing

Yes, there will always be people who seem to have come further in life than we have. There will always be those who are more artistically gifted,  more intelligent, more compassionate than us. 

And sometimes, you are the one that is better at a certain skill than another.

Comparison is a funny thing.  It often has you looking at only one side of the coin.  Life has a way of balancing things out.  See the beauty in others and see the beauty in yourself.  Know your worth and make sure those around you feel worthy.  

Spend your energy and time wisely

Spend your beautiful time and energy taking inspired action, being curious, and experiencing life with childlike wonder.  You will begin to witness your own growth and see that you are naturally moving in the direction of your desires.  Give yourself some love and celebrate your own uniqueness – you deserve it!

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